advertisement

Friendship woes – win some lose some – keeping/losing friends in University

14054505_10153747365241717_4939874860792060427_o

We come to university vowing that the strong ties we have kept thus far with our secondary school mates and Junior College (JC) friends will not be torn. But can we actually live up to the promises we made – of staying in touch, meeting during our breaks for lunch and every week for dinner?

Here’s the sad truth… we don’t.

To start off, we might go to different universities. Take it from someone who knows; my closest friend in JC not only went to a different university, but shifted to a different part of the world altogether. So, out went our various plans to meet over shared breaks and joining the gym together (we still intend to stick to the latter, but have been failing at it miserably).

17311251_10155323218864050_5324779356564107804_o

Secondly, you might be in different faculties, departments or different classes. People differ from each other, and therefore it’s only natural that you won’t always be able to get the same modules or same classes as your buddies. A friend from Medicine recently told me how despite the school being so small (compared to the various departments that make up one faculty) he still isn’t in the same ‘house’ as his friends. Thus, rest assured, you won’t always have the same classes or the same breaks.

Time is cruel. You’ll get busy. And the further you get into your University years, the busier you get. This is regardless of which faculty you belong to. Your modules will get harder. Internships, exchanges, and seminars – these are only but a few things that’ll start taking up more of your time. And the little breaks you will have, you’d rather devote to the noblest pursuits (aka sleep), than meeting anyone.

And this will make you lose friends, there’s no helping it.

Now, I’m aware of how depressing all this sounds, but then again, when has life been easy?

Fret not, young Padawan! All is not lost, and spring is not gone.

fullsizeoutput_195f

At university, you are introduced to a whole new universe. The plethora of knowledge, activities, opinions and human interaction that come your way are exhilarating (and overwhelming). But don’t fret! Many of us meet some of our closest friends in the lecture theatres of a module we are too afraid to take.

I met one of my closest friends when she saved me from a relatively annoying bench mate. She called me over to sit beside her and we’ve been the best of buddies ever since. We’d never heard of each other previously! So, as you can see, it’s not all work and no play, you will meet new people and who knows, maybe meet your best friend here too!

CAMPS! I’m personally huge on camps because I feel that camps are one of the most secure yet liberal places to meet new people! 🙂 I came to become great buddies with someone I didn’t get along with before, after we went to camp together and I got to know her better. It’s the whole shared experiences quotient that bonds people, you get to see a side they probably won’t always open up on a daily basis. When you’re coming into a new environment, everyone has similar apprehensions, thus bonding happens a lot faster in my opinion.

IMG_2208

If you’ve stayed in a hostel, be it hall or residential colleges, you are bound to make new friends. All you got to do is have an open heart and a bit of joie de vivre, and you’re all set! All faculties come together in these hostels and you’ll be shocked at the various types of people you’ll meet there, and most definitely the different viewpoints you’ll be made privy to. Your neighbours most probably won’t be from the same faculty, and even if they are, hey! It’s always nice to find someone new to grab lunch with!

The list is not exhaustive. You’ll meet people during CCA practices, trainings and whatnot. The only thing that is set and certain, YOU WILL MAKE NEW FRIENDS. But that does not mean you must lose everyone else completely.

I still meet my best friend every time she is back in Singapore. Almost all my free days and nights are dedicated to her, and trust me, if a friendship is true, it won’t even feel like you’ve been apart for long.

So, have an open mind and a heart without fear! University will give and keep your friends!

IMG_2272